1 00:00:05,230 --> 00:00:06,230 Come in. 2 00:00:09,890 --> 00:00:12,170 Mary, can I talk to you a second? 3 00:00:12,450 --> 00:00:15,390 If it's for a quick second, Nicholas, I'm studying for midterms. 4 00:00:16,190 --> 00:00:20,930 Well, at school tomorrow, everybody's supposed to get shots and tutelading 5 00:00:20,930 --> 00:00:22,470 against the measles. 6 00:00:24,090 --> 00:00:26,130 Tutelading against the measles. 7 00:00:26,870 --> 00:00:28,650 Nicholas, do you mean inoculating? 8 00:00:29,590 --> 00:00:31,610 Inoculate. Inoculate. Okay. 9 00:00:32,299 --> 00:00:35,540 Uh, I'm glad to hear that you're getting inoculated against the measles because 10 00:00:35,540 --> 00:00:37,340 measles are a bummer. 11 00:00:37,700 --> 00:00:42,520 Yeah, well, I was wondering, you know, why I couldn't wait till you were a 12 00:00:42,520 --> 00:00:44,280 doctor so then you can give me the shot. 13 00:00:45,280 --> 00:00:49,340 Well, I appreciate the business, Nicholas, but I'm a long way from 14 00:00:49,340 --> 00:00:52,840 doctor. Well, I don't even start med school till next September. 15 00:00:53,800 --> 00:00:57,740 Then there's internship, residency, and my specialty. 16 00:00:58,520 --> 00:01:00,220 How long is all that gonna take? 17 00:01:00,720 --> 00:01:01,720 Hmm. 18 00:01:02,080 --> 00:01:03,080 About seven years. 19 00:01:05,220 --> 00:01:06,220 Seven years? 20 00:01:06,440 --> 00:01:07,500 I can wait. 21 00:02:35,850 --> 00:02:36,850 Oh, hi, Dad. 22 00:02:37,510 --> 00:02:41,050 Nicholas, how many times do I have to tell you not to leave these in the 23 00:02:41,050 --> 00:02:42,990 driveway? I'm sorry, Dad. 24 00:02:43,310 --> 00:02:44,310 Hey, what are you doing, champ? 25 00:02:44,910 --> 00:02:46,250 Tommy's going to fix my bike. 26 00:02:46,530 --> 00:02:47,489 Oh, yeah? 27 00:02:47,490 --> 00:02:49,070 Boy, you look serious. 28 00:02:49,410 --> 00:02:50,670 What seems to be the problem? 29 00:02:51,790 --> 00:02:53,530 My allowance. I need a new bike. 30 00:02:54,130 --> 00:02:57,070 Oh, well, we'll discuss finances later. 31 00:02:57,330 --> 00:03:01,090 Right now, I want you all to come in the house because I have an announcement to 32 00:03:01,090 --> 00:03:03,610 make that I think you're going to find very interesting. 33 00:03:03,910 --> 00:03:07,920 What is it, Dad? Tell me. No, no, no, no, I'm going to tell all of you 34 00:03:08,120 --> 00:03:08,640 Come on 35 00:03:08,640 --> 00:03:25,500 What's 36 00:03:25,500 --> 00:03:29,250 going on is something wrong No, no, let's just wait till everybody gathers. 37 00:03:29,250 --> 00:03:31,070 is it, a kitchen thing or a dining room thing? 38 00:03:31,270 --> 00:03:34,970 Oh, no, no, this is a real big good thing. This is a dining room thing. 39 00:03:35,250 --> 00:03:36,410 You're getting us another car. 40 00:03:36,810 --> 00:03:40,170 No, Elizabeth, you're going to build us a pool. I knew you'd give in. Yeah, 41 00:03:40,250 --> 00:03:42,770 that's what you're going to do. I heard the battle cry. What's up? 42 00:03:43,050 --> 00:03:46,750 Dad changed his mind about the pool. No, no, no, let's just wait till everybody 43 00:03:46,750 --> 00:03:47,750 gets here, all right? 44 00:03:48,230 --> 00:03:49,230 Mary, Susan! 45 00:03:49,530 --> 00:03:51,550 Come on, Dad, what is it, a car or a pool? 46 00:03:51,870 --> 00:03:52,870 A pool. 47 00:03:53,020 --> 00:03:56,600 Yeah, Dad has a very important announcement to make. Yeah, well, can't 48 00:03:56,640 --> 00:03:57,740 I've got to get ready for a date. 49 00:03:57,960 --> 00:04:01,440 Oh, really? Well, you just tell your young man to wait a few moments for your 50 00:04:01,440 --> 00:04:04,880 old man while he has a little self -indulgence. Now, everybody, into the 51 00:04:04,880 --> 00:04:09,000 room, because this is good news. I can join the swim team now. Very exciting. 52 00:04:09,080 --> 00:04:12,840 Yeah, well, I hope it's important. You know, we're studying for midterm. What 53 00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:16,740 it? What's going on here anyway, huh? You all lobbying for bigger allowances 54 00:04:16,740 --> 00:04:17,719 something like that? 55 00:04:17,720 --> 00:04:21,000 Everybody's here now, Tom. Okay, very good. All right, are you ready? Ready. 56 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,120 There is a celebrity amongst us. 57 00:04:23,740 --> 00:04:25,440 Elizabeth, you got busted again, haven't you? 58 00:04:26,000 --> 00:04:27,720 No, no, no. I was referring to me. 59 00:04:28,020 --> 00:04:29,020 You got busted? 60 00:04:29,480 --> 00:04:33,780 No, I didn't get busted. Will you stop interrupting and let me talk? This is 61 00:04:33,780 --> 00:04:34,759 very important. 62 00:04:34,760 --> 00:04:38,360 This is bigger than a pool, bigger than a car. Now, you are going to meet 63 00:04:38,360 --> 00:04:41,520 somebody very, very important. Now, wait right there. Very important. 64 00:04:41,780 --> 00:04:43,540 Okay, wait. Don't go. Don't go. Wait. 65 00:04:44,460 --> 00:04:46,000 Is there someone in there? 66 00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:48,200 Ta -da! 67 00:04:52,620 --> 00:04:53,920 important person. Me. 68 00:04:55,840 --> 00:05:00,120 No, really, the California Press Club, that venerable institution of newsmen 69 00:05:00,120 --> 00:05:04,780 from the old school of journalism, have awarded my humble column for public 70 00:05:04,780 --> 00:05:05,800 service and excellence. 71 00:05:06,220 --> 00:05:10,580 You hear that? Your father, the man who you love and adore and abuse so 72 00:05:10,580 --> 00:05:15,060 fervently, is about to win their version of the Pulitzer Prize, the coveted 73 00:05:15,060 --> 00:05:16,060 altruistic award. 74 00:05:16,740 --> 00:05:17,740 That's great. 75 00:05:18,440 --> 00:05:19,800 That's bigger than a pool? 76 00:05:23,240 --> 00:05:24,139 me, Dad. 77 00:05:24,140 --> 00:05:25,360 See? He understands. 78 00:05:26,360 --> 00:05:28,100 What's allorilistic? 79 00:05:28,620 --> 00:05:32,220 Allorilistic? Altruistic, Nicholas, and it means doing good for others. 80 00:05:32,700 --> 00:05:33,700 Congratulations. 81 00:05:34,060 --> 00:05:36,040 Yeah, something like giving people a pool. 82 00:05:36,880 --> 00:05:38,820 You mean like in the Cub Scout manual? 83 00:05:39,360 --> 00:05:40,360 Sort of. 84 00:05:40,460 --> 00:05:41,880 Do you get a merit badge? 85 00:05:42,280 --> 00:05:43,239 Well, yes. 86 00:05:43,240 --> 00:05:46,800 At my age, it's a merit badge, only they call it prestige. And guess what? 87 00:05:46,860 --> 00:05:50,320 That's not all. The best part of it is... Oh, Abby, will you hear this? I am 88 00:05:50,320 --> 00:05:54,140 going to receive the award here. They are taking me up to downtown San 89 00:05:54,140 --> 00:05:58,620 Francisco. I've made all the arrangements, and we are going to... You 90 00:05:58,620 --> 00:06:01,880 That's right, and I've made all the arrangements, and everything is going to 91 00:06:01,880 --> 00:06:06,940 happen. Oh, doesn't seem to be too much for us in Dad's big news. Yeah, I'd like 92 00:06:06,940 --> 00:06:10,040 to go to San Francisco. Hooray. I would have settled for a pool. 93 00:06:10,600 --> 00:06:12,860 I would have settled for a merit badge. 94 00:06:14,460 --> 00:06:16,180 You must be higher than a kite. 95 00:06:16,400 --> 00:06:19,640 Yeah, well, who would have guessed that all this time I was being tagged for 96 00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:23,660 greatness? Oh, I would have guessed. You got me, didn't you? Yeah, I got you. 97 00:06:24,240 --> 00:06:26,240 And that makes me feel higher than a kite. 98 00:06:31,700 --> 00:06:32,700 Excuse me. 99 00:06:33,220 --> 00:06:35,220 I'm not interrupting you, am I? No. 100 00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:36,640 Good. 101 00:06:37,050 --> 00:06:38,710 Dad, I just had an idea about something. 102 00:06:38,950 --> 00:06:42,830 Yeah, well, it better be a good one, considering your timing. Well, you know 103 00:06:42,830 --> 00:06:47,130 you're always trying to get us to plan ahead, to be prepared, you know, like 104 00:06:47,130 --> 00:06:50,150 shopping early for Christmas or saving for a rainy day? 105 00:06:50,350 --> 00:06:53,930 Anytime anybody quotes me to me, I can tell that I'm being set up. 106 00:06:54,170 --> 00:06:56,390 Dad, this isn't a set up. This is good sense. 107 00:06:57,250 --> 00:07:01,450 Since I'm probably going to be going to med school in San Francisco this fall, 108 00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:05,970 it makes good sense to me to go there now. You know, to... 109 00:07:06,270 --> 00:07:07,450 Get the feel of the place. 110 00:07:07,670 --> 00:07:09,610 Check out apartments and stuff. Right, Abby? 111 00:07:10,710 --> 00:07:14,550 I don't think so. I mean, I think it makes much more sense to stay home here 112 00:07:14,550 --> 00:07:16,090 take care of the stuff around here. 113 00:07:16,990 --> 00:07:17,990 It's a good try. 114 00:07:20,610 --> 00:07:21,870 I'll get you next time, though. 115 00:07:26,630 --> 00:07:28,490 Oh, you handled that very well. 116 00:07:29,170 --> 00:07:32,770 Experience. Well, I've always said you were a man of experience. 117 00:08:05,119 --> 00:08:06,119 Anne Boleyn. 118 00:08:06,980 --> 00:08:11,620 We had our first dress rehearsal, you know, and I think my tear -stained 119 00:08:11,620 --> 00:08:14,140 are stained permanently. Well, how'd it go? What happened? 120 00:08:15,340 --> 00:08:16,760 Oh, it was okay, I guess. 121 00:08:17,060 --> 00:08:23,140 Just... Well, here's the deal. See, I think I'm doing fine, Abby, right up 122 00:08:23,140 --> 00:08:27,120 the end, you know, where Anne Boleyn has to walk up the guillotine and hand the 123 00:08:27,120 --> 00:08:28,800 silver coin to the executioner. 124 00:08:29,040 --> 00:08:31,760 And she says... Well, here, show it to me. Go ahead. 125 00:08:38,669 --> 00:08:40,830 May your aim be swift and true. 126 00:08:42,429 --> 00:08:45,210 Oh, bravo, bravo, Judy. That was great. 127 00:08:45,430 --> 00:08:48,950 No, no, it's close, but it's good. No encores, I think. 128 00:08:50,150 --> 00:08:53,890 Oh, Abby, this is the last word, you know, that this girl's ever going to say 129 00:08:53,890 --> 00:09:00,610 her whole life. And it's just not... It's not full enough, you know? Of 130 00:09:00,610 --> 00:09:05,330 course, I don't want to push it or anything. It's just... I don't know, I'm 131 00:09:05,330 --> 00:09:06,330 stuck. 132 00:09:09,100 --> 00:09:13,240 You know, if I could just see a real professional and how she handled that 133 00:09:13,240 --> 00:09:14,780 part, I know I could do a better performance. 134 00:09:15,300 --> 00:09:16,740 Yeah, oh, yeah, that'd be great. Yeah. 135 00:09:17,180 --> 00:09:22,220 Do you know there is a major production of this very same play in San Francisco 136 00:09:22,220 --> 00:09:23,220 right now? 137 00:09:24,260 --> 00:09:27,860 Oh, I see your problem. I do. 138 00:09:28,220 --> 00:09:30,280 You do? Oh, yeah, yeah, absolutely. 139 00:09:30,540 --> 00:09:32,780 And the solution, you see, is very simple. 140 00:09:33,320 --> 00:09:37,940 See... When you make that lonely walk to the gallows, you should think of 141 00:09:37,940 --> 00:09:43,260 something really traumatic, like being stuck at home this weekend while your 142 00:09:43,260 --> 00:09:44,740 father and I go to San Francisco. 143 00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:48,320 Oh, yeah. 144 00:09:50,180 --> 00:09:53,940 You really understand a lot more than you let on. Well, I'll say this, I'll 145 00:09:53,940 --> 00:09:58,480 this. If your performance on stage is half as good as it was here today, 146 00:09:58,480 --> 00:09:59,480 be dynamite. 147 00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:01,840 Dino might. 148 00:10:02,180 --> 00:10:03,660 Oh, yeah, it takes a lot. 149 00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:06,840 Hump. 150 00:10:07,040 --> 00:10:09,540 Hump? I want to go to San Francisco. 151 00:10:09,780 --> 00:10:10,439 You'll see. 152 00:10:10,440 --> 00:10:11,440 I'll think of something. 153 00:10:11,540 --> 00:10:12,540 I bet you will. 154 00:10:31,070 --> 00:10:32,510 Dad, can we talk to you for a minute? 155 00:10:32,810 --> 00:10:34,430 Oh, yeah, sure. Come on in, fellas. 156 00:10:39,030 --> 00:10:40,630 All right, what's the problem, men? 157 00:10:40,830 --> 00:10:42,630 Are your sisters picking on you again? 158 00:10:42,870 --> 00:10:45,810 Yeah, but we fix them up. We put a frog in the bath. 159 00:10:47,770 --> 00:10:49,110 Unmistakably a sign of war. 160 00:10:49,610 --> 00:10:52,750 Uh, Dad, you know how I like boats and stuff, right? 161 00:10:53,030 --> 00:10:55,870 Uh, no, as a matter of fact. I mean, it sounds harmless enough. 162 00:10:56,250 --> 00:10:58,590 What about you, Nicholas? Are you interested in boats, too? 163 00:10:58,890 --> 00:11:05,530 Nah, just frogs and the 49ers and the subway cars and... Anyway, we 164 00:11:05,530 --> 00:11:09,630 thought since you weren't giving us a pool, maybe you'd take us to San 165 00:11:09,630 --> 00:11:11,210 with you, just to see boats and stuff. 166 00:11:11,630 --> 00:11:14,830 Yeah, and ride the subway and walk across the big bridges. 167 00:11:15,130 --> 00:11:16,450 And miss a day of school? 168 00:11:16,890 --> 00:11:21,130 No. This is a business trip. I'm sorry. But next time, you'll definitely be with 169 00:11:21,130 --> 00:11:22,570 me. Don't be angry now. I mean it. 170 00:11:30,990 --> 00:11:31,990 Just cruising through. 171 00:11:33,210 --> 00:11:34,450 How's your speech developing? 172 00:11:34,790 --> 00:11:36,390 Oh, I tell you, it's a real migraine. 173 00:11:36,730 --> 00:11:37,730 Yeah? 174 00:11:38,110 --> 00:11:41,010 Maybe it's because your desk is such a mess here. 175 00:11:41,210 --> 00:11:44,030 Listen, if you think that's messy, you should see what it's like up here. 176 00:11:45,010 --> 00:11:49,210 You know, it's funny to you, but, you know, I am a writer, not a public 177 00:11:49,390 --> 00:11:52,290 The press club is going to think they've given this war to some illiterate 178 00:11:52,290 --> 00:11:55,150 carnival bargain. Well, that's okay, because, see, by the time they figure 179 00:11:55,150 --> 00:11:56,610 out, it'll be too late to take it back. 180 00:11:56,890 --> 00:11:57,890 Do you mind? 181 00:11:58,690 --> 00:11:59,990 Thanks a lot. 182 00:12:00,959 --> 00:12:02,060 Come on, Tom. 183 00:12:02,740 --> 00:12:06,320 This is going to be the best speech those old folkies ever heard. Well, 184 00:12:06,320 --> 00:12:07,420 not the best. The best. 185 00:12:07,680 --> 00:12:08,680 The best. 186 00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:11,960 Hi. 187 00:12:12,240 --> 00:12:13,159 I'm home. 188 00:12:13,160 --> 00:12:14,160 So is he. 189 00:12:14,740 --> 00:12:15,740 Any calls? 190 00:12:15,980 --> 00:12:18,820 Why don't you check the bulletin board? And there is the mail for you on the 191 00:12:18,820 --> 00:12:19,900 porch. Mail? 192 00:12:20,240 --> 00:12:21,240 Dad, 193 00:12:21,860 --> 00:12:24,220 listen, about San Francisco... Absolutely not. 194 00:12:26,980 --> 00:12:28,240 I figured you'd say that. 195 00:12:29,490 --> 00:12:30,490 Don't let me interrupt you. 196 00:12:31,210 --> 00:12:32,210 Bye. 197 00:12:38,170 --> 00:12:41,130 Absolutely not. What do you mean, absolutely not? Have you given any real 198 00:12:41,130 --> 00:12:42,130 thought to the idea? 199 00:12:42,210 --> 00:12:47,070 Why? No has always been the safest answer. Oh, come on. The trip together, 200 00:12:47,070 --> 00:12:50,070 to know them a lot better. Listen, take it from somebody who does know them a 201 00:12:50,070 --> 00:12:53,810 lot better. You don't want to know them better. Oh, Tom, they're your family. 202 00:12:53,890 --> 00:12:54,890 They're not the enemy. 203 00:12:55,270 --> 00:12:56,270 That's what you think. 204 00:12:57,530 --> 00:12:58,530 You know... 205 00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:01,180 I was looking forward to us being alone. 206 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:09,640 You really want them to come don't you? 207 00:13:28,110 --> 00:13:30,970 We're going to stay, but we'll do it. Hey, Mary, did you hear? Did you hear 208 00:13:30,970 --> 00:13:32,270 father's taking us to San Francisco? 209 00:13:33,630 --> 00:13:34,810 There's no reason to go. 210 00:13:35,810 --> 00:13:37,590 I just got turned down by med school. 211 00:13:38,590 --> 00:13:39,590 What? 212 00:13:49,890 --> 00:13:53,690 You know, it says here that you've been placed on the waiting list. Yeah, number 213 00:13:53,690 --> 00:13:56,310 32, which might as well be 32 million. 214 00:13:57,680 --> 00:14:00,840 Look, Abby, I know somebody who was number five last year, and they're still 215 00:14:00,840 --> 00:14:01,840 waiting. 216 00:14:02,160 --> 00:14:06,420 Look, Mary, I know how important it seems right now, but it's not the end of 217 00:14:06,420 --> 00:14:10,900 world, and this isn't the only med school in the world either. Well, it 218 00:14:10,900 --> 00:14:12,420 to be the only one that I applied to. 219 00:14:12,680 --> 00:14:13,920 So apply to others. 220 00:14:15,600 --> 00:14:18,300 Better yet, why don't I take a correspondence course? 221 00:14:19,440 --> 00:14:20,920 You're not being very fair to yourself. 222 00:14:21,160 --> 00:14:22,160 Fair? 223 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:24,300 Abby, don't talk to me about being fair. 224 00:14:24,780 --> 00:14:29,100 Look... Ever since I got interested in medicine, I have known exactly what I 225 00:14:29,100 --> 00:14:30,100 wanted. 226 00:14:30,700 --> 00:14:35,460 I didn't apply to another med school because I was so certain I'd get in. 227 00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:40,280 In the end, all we do is do what we want, right? 228 00:14:42,760 --> 00:14:43,840 Not all the way. 229 00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:51,760 You know, Mary, sometimes life can be very disappointing, but it's in those 230 00:14:51,760 --> 00:14:56,880 times that it's our obligation to toughen up, you know? Abby, please. Can 231 00:14:56,880 --> 00:15:00,940 be... Yeah. 232 00:15:16,960 --> 00:15:20,020 Hey, don't forget to pack warm clothes for San Francisco, okay? 233 00:15:21,740 --> 00:15:22,740 Right. 234 00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:36,300 Did you have any better luck with her than I did? No, no, I didn't. You know 235 00:15:36,300 --> 00:15:39,640 what the real problem is? Mary has always been like the brains of the 236 00:15:39,720 --> 00:15:40,780 and she's not used to failure. 237 00:15:41,210 --> 00:15:45,070 I tell you right now, I would give anything to get her in there. In that 238 00:15:45,090 --> 00:15:47,290 would you mind if I contacted an old friend? 239 00:15:47,690 --> 00:15:49,130 Huh? Why would I mind? 240 00:15:49,450 --> 00:15:51,890 Well, maybe because he and I were very close. 241 00:15:52,190 --> 00:15:53,190 Oh. 242 00:15:53,410 --> 00:15:54,570 How close is close? 243 00:15:55,110 --> 00:15:56,110 Very close. 244 00:15:56,410 --> 00:15:57,910 We go back a long way. 245 00:15:58,210 --> 00:15:59,210 Yeah, sure. 246 00:15:59,980 --> 00:16:04,040 You must have been very close if you kept track of each other since the good 247 00:16:04,040 --> 00:16:06,900 days. Tom, nobody's kept track of anybody. 248 00:16:07,220 --> 00:16:12,020 Look, his name is Ted Kellogg, and he just happens to be the dean of 249 00:16:12,020 --> 00:16:13,340 to Mary's med school. 250 00:16:13,720 --> 00:16:17,920 I just know that if he knew that Mary were a close friend of mine, he would 251 00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:19,560 to it that she was reconsidered. 252 00:16:20,240 --> 00:16:22,480 Why not take advantage of an old friend, huh? 253 00:16:23,180 --> 00:16:26,260 Well, yeah, I guess since we're going to be in San Francisco anyway, why not 254 00:16:26,260 --> 00:16:28,520 look old Teddy boy up, go and have a drink with him? 255 00:16:28,910 --> 00:16:31,710 Talk about the good old days, like one close friend to another. 256 00:16:31,950 --> 00:16:32,950 You're jealous. 257 00:16:33,190 --> 00:16:39,510 Yes, I am a little jealous. I didn't know... Oh, it only shows with the green 258 00:16:39,510 --> 00:16:40,510 around your gills. 259 00:16:41,110 --> 00:16:42,830 Tom, it's for Mary's sake. 260 00:16:43,270 --> 00:16:45,650 Look, I'd have no interest in seeing him again. 261 00:16:46,030 --> 00:16:47,730 You're my only close friend now. 262 00:16:48,070 --> 00:16:52,210 But if Ted can assist Mary in this, I mean, we'd be foolish not to try, right? 263 00:16:52,570 --> 00:16:54,350 Yeah, I guess you're right. 264 00:16:54,870 --> 00:16:58,230 All right, then, for Mary's sake, I'll get the jealousy out of sight. 265 00:16:58,680 --> 00:16:59,680 If not, out of mind. 266 00:17:01,100 --> 00:17:02,520 Are you going to mention this to Mary? 267 00:17:02,780 --> 00:17:04,300 Oh, no, no. Let's don't get our hopes up yet. 268 00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:10,579 Yeah. Listen, Abby, just how close were you in this darn war? If you don't want 269 00:17:10,579 --> 00:17:14,200 to know the answer, don't ask the question. Well, I don't want to know the 270 00:17:14,200 --> 00:17:15,200 answer. Oh. 271 00:17:17,119 --> 00:17:18,240 Go. Get out of here. 272 00:17:31,590 --> 00:17:34,130 Is anybody else home? Am I alone in this big house? 273 00:17:34,450 --> 00:17:38,770 Oh, hiya. How was work? Oh, good. Got your things organized, huh? Oh, yeah. 274 00:17:38,770 --> 00:17:40,050 without some resistance, though. 275 00:17:40,770 --> 00:17:44,390 Elizabeth insists on packing enough for a three -month vacation in Nicholas' 276 00:17:44,470 --> 00:17:46,190 house. It's not fair. It's not fair, Dad. 277 00:17:46,570 --> 00:17:51,330 Would it be fair for me to ask exactly what isn't fair? Oh, yeah. I can't go to 278 00:17:51,330 --> 00:17:54,330 San Francisco. And you know why? Because the psychology test I have tomorrow and 279 00:17:54,330 --> 00:17:58,910 the professor insists that I take it or get a nap. Oh, boy, that guy. I just 280 00:17:58,910 --> 00:18:01,670 can't stand him. Oh, he's actually nice, Johnny. Always nice. He's always 281 00:18:01,670 --> 00:18:05,450 smiling, but I know him. Oh, God, he's got schizophrenic tendencies and he's 282 00:18:05,450 --> 00:18:06,470 paranoid. That's it. 283 00:18:06,690 --> 00:18:10,710 Right. I'm sure that right now, while you're talking, this very minute, he's 284 00:18:10,710 --> 00:18:12,370 talking behind your back. Yes. 285 00:18:13,110 --> 00:18:14,110 God, that guy. 286 00:18:14,610 --> 00:18:15,610 Oh, 287 00:18:16,150 --> 00:18:20,190 she's right, you know, Dad. She's really counting on this trip. 288 00:18:20,410 --> 00:18:21,930 I know. Poor Susan. 289 00:18:22,570 --> 00:18:24,790 Well, maybe we can fix it up. 290 00:18:25,510 --> 00:18:28,230 Yes. One ticket, one way to San Francisco. 291 00:18:29,100 --> 00:18:32,960 Mm -hmm. Flight 327, 7 .15, Saturday morning. Thank you. 292 00:18:34,060 --> 00:18:34,959 All right. 293 00:18:34,960 --> 00:18:38,700 Susan's ticket will be waiting for her at the gate. Oh, Dad, sometimes you're 294 00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:39,700 really out of sight. 295 00:18:39,940 --> 00:18:43,460 I only wish all problems could be solved that easily. I'm going to tell Susan, 296 00:18:43,540 --> 00:18:45,140 okay? No, no, no, no. 297 00:18:45,660 --> 00:18:46,660 Don't tell her yet. 298 00:18:46,720 --> 00:18:48,900 Let her suffer a little. It builds character. 299 00:18:49,580 --> 00:18:50,580 Huh? 300 00:18:58,220 --> 00:19:00,200 I think her character is built by now. You can tell her. 301 00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:02,640 David, 302 00:19:08,180 --> 00:19:09,620 my boy, look what I have for you. 303 00:19:10,700 --> 00:19:13,160 Thanks. You know what's an amazing thing? 304 00:19:13,540 --> 00:19:16,860 Since you moved out of the house, I think we see you twice as much as we 305 00:19:16,860 --> 00:19:19,420 to. Yeah, we get along twice as much, too. 306 00:19:20,580 --> 00:19:22,220 One of life's little ironies. 307 00:19:22,940 --> 00:19:24,060 Could you do me a favor? 308 00:19:24,590 --> 00:19:27,930 Could you drive Susan to the airport on Saturday morning? She can't go to San 309 00:19:27,930 --> 00:19:29,190 Francisco with us on Friday. 310 00:19:29,570 --> 00:19:32,050 You mean I don't get to go to San Francisco like everyone else? 311 00:19:32,530 --> 00:19:36,570 No. I mean, yes, if you want to. It's just that I thought that you had 312 00:19:36,570 --> 00:19:38,050 given up on family outings. 313 00:19:38,390 --> 00:19:39,650 Not all family outings. 314 00:19:40,070 --> 00:19:42,210 Actually, I was kind of looking forward to going on this one. 315 00:19:42,850 --> 00:19:45,790 But as you can see, I have a big date this weekend. 316 00:19:46,270 --> 00:19:47,690 Yes, so I noticed. 317 00:19:48,550 --> 00:19:53,290 I tell you what, then. Why don't you and your date stay around here? 318 00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:58,620 Keep an eye on the house while we are gone, and maybe I could spring for a 319 00:19:58,620 --> 00:20:02,220 corsage. Oh, thanks. I think she'd like that. 320 00:20:02,700 --> 00:20:03,700 Very good. 321 00:20:07,700 --> 00:20:08,700 Oh. 322 00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:14,200 You've got a window. Oh, no, no, no. I've got a window. Oh, I know. Just 323 00:20:14,200 --> 00:20:18,580 down. Everybody, you can take turns sitting next to the window. Did 324 00:20:18,580 --> 00:20:20,340 to the bathroom? We're not going to make any pit stops. 325 00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:21,760 Everybody in. Okay. 326 00:20:22,120 --> 00:20:23,120 Okay, 327 00:20:24,400 --> 00:20:27,060 everybody, let's work together. Nicholas, what have you got in the box? 328 00:20:27,300 --> 00:20:28,259 Prince Charles. 329 00:20:28,260 --> 00:20:29,260 Prince Charles. 330 00:20:29,580 --> 00:20:31,040 Oh, it's a frog. 331 00:20:31,260 --> 00:20:35,120 No frogs in San Francisco. Come on. Put it in the house like I said. 332 00:20:35,420 --> 00:20:37,040 I don't believe this family. 333 00:21:59,510 --> 00:22:01,770 Nicholas! Will you get off there? 334 00:22:02,090 --> 00:22:05,370 And just stay with your sisters, please. I can't keep an eye on you and get a 335 00:22:05,370 --> 00:22:08,030 room, too. Harvey, come on. Keep an eye on them, will you, please? 336 00:22:09,490 --> 00:22:13,250 Excuse me, please. I was here first. I'll be one second. May I help you? Yes. 337 00:22:13,670 --> 00:22:14,710 Bradford, I have a reservation. 338 00:22:15,090 --> 00:22:16,410 Oh, yes. Mr. Bradford. 339 00:22:17,950 --> 00:22:19,670 I'll have a bellhop bring your luggage. 340 00:22:20,190 --> 00:22:24,550 Oh, listen, I'm not too good at mathematics, but could you possibly tell 341 00:22:24,550 --> 00:22:26,950 two keys can get eight people into three rooms? 342 00:22:27,370 --> 00:22:28,370 That must be a mistake. 343 00:22:28,570 --> 00:22:32,490 Undoubtedly. Well, our records show that you changed your original reservation 344 00:22:32,490 --> 00:22:34,830 of one room to two rooms. Correction. 345 00:22:35,280 --> 00:22:38,200 I add it to my one room with two extra rooms. 346 00:22:38,660 --> 00:22:42,440 Now, obviously, this is a mistake on the part of the hotel, so I'm very sure 347 00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:46,380 that you'll be happy to fix it for me. I'm terribly sorry, Mr. Bradford, but 348 00:22:46,380 --> 00:22:48,420 there are several conventions in town this weekend. 349 00:22:48,660 --> 00:22:53,560 We have three staying in this hotel. The entire city is overbooked, and these 350 00:22:53,560 --> 00:22:55,020 men are waiting for rooms. 351 00:22:55,380 --> 00:22:56,860 I've been waiting for three hours. 352 00:22:57,280 --> 00:23:00,920 Please, make up your mind. Take them or leave them. 353 00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:02,760 Dad, I've got to make a pizza. 354 00:23:13,130 --> 00:23:16,270 The town is loaded with conventions, but I got us two little rooms on the other 355 00:23:16,270 --> 00:23:18,790 side of town and a little hotel called the Golden Eagle. 356 00:23:19,530 --> 00:23:22,590 Now, look, you and I will take the boys over there and let Mary stay here and 357 00:23:22,590 --> 00:23:23,590 look after the girls. 358 00:23:23,650 --> 00:23:25,110 I don't know, 359 00:23:25,930 --> 00:23:28,390 Tom. I don't think Mary can handle the job in her present mood. 360 00:23:29,210 --> 00:23:31,190 Besides, the girls don't listen to her anyway. 361 00:23:31,550 --> 00:23:33,150 I think I'd better stay here with the girls. 362 00:23:33,550 --> 00:23:36,030 What happened to you and me alone in San Francisco? 363 00:23:36,550 --> 00:23:38,390 We'll be together most of the time. 364 00:23:38,930 --> 00:23:40,970 Besides, you'll have a little peace and quiet. 365 00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:43,500 I bet it's a really beautiful hotel. 366 00:23:55,500 --> 00:23:58,520 Old -fashioned type of hotel. 367 00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:00,100 Yeah, we. 368 00:24:01,360 --> 00:24:04,000 And they look like they think we're in here. 369 00:24:13,260 --> 00:24:14,620 coming around in that room. Things? 370 00:24:15,160 --> 00:24:16,960 What kind of things, Nicholas? 371 00:24:17,320 --> 00:24:18,960 Uh, Dad, those things. 372 00:24:19,240 --> 00:24:23,900 Oh, I hate those things. When I turned on the light, they all ran under the 373 00:24:25,740 --> 00:24:27,620 I'm sorry, Nicholas, but don't worry. 374 00:24:27,960 --> 00:24:29,360 We're bigger than they are. 375 00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,080 Yeah, but we're not numbers. 376 00:24:33,460 --> 00:24:34,980 I'm sorry about this, fellas. 377 00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:36,600 It's a real mess. 378 00:24:37,180 --> 00:24:38,320 Oh, that's okay, Dad. 379 00:24:38,820 --> 00:24:40,120 We'll sleep with the lights on. 380 00:24:43,370 --> 00:24:46,090 Beautiful. Yeah. Wow, this is great. 381 00:24:47,210 --> 00:24:50,050 Hey, Abby, Rich is fun. Let's do this more often. 382 00:24:50,410 --> 00:24:53,370 Rich is fun. Let's do this more often. Where's Elizabeth? 383 00:24:53,730 --> 00:24:57,930 Elizabeth is probably patrolling the lobby looking for available men, don't 384 00:24:57,930 --> 00:24:58,649 think? Yeah. 385 00:24:58,650 --> 00:25:02,070 Have you girls finished unpacking? Uh -huh. Yeah, but Mary hasn't. 386 00:25:02,430 --> 00:25:05,050 She's not very interested in talking with us. No? No. 387 00:25:14,219 --> 00:25:18,260 Hey, I think you guys should give Mary some space. You know what I mean? I 388 00:25:18,280 --> 00:25:19,520 she's got a lot on her mind. 389 00:25:20,040 --> 00:25:21,300 Sure, okay. Yeah. 390 00:25:21,940 --> 00:25:24,780 Yeah, she's real upset about that med school thing. Yeah, I know. She's not 391 00:25:24,780 --> 00:25:25,699 talking to anybody. 392 00:25:25,700 --> 00:25:26,700 Hi, Dad. 393 00:25:27,060 --> 00:25:28,100 Is it that bad? 394 00:25:28,320 --> 00:25:31,440 It's worse. The boys are downstairs now trying to buy insecticide. 395 00:25:31,700 --> 00:25:34,600 No, come on. It's got to be better than sleeping in the streets. 396 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:37,180 Don't jump to conclusions. 397 00:25:48,010 --> 00:25:50,610 I can drop the kids off on my way to see that friend we discussed. 398 00:25:50,890 --> 00:25:51,890 What about me? 399 00:25:51,910 --> 00:25:52,910 What about me? 400 00:25:53,130 --> 00:25:54,130 What about you? 401 00:25:54,170 --> 00:25:57,450 I want to go see the 49ers and ride the subway. You promised. 402 00:25:57,790 --> 00:26:01,210 All right. The 49ers first and then the subway, okay? Is it a deal? 403 00:26:02,530 --> 00:26:05,530 Have fun. Bye -bye. Come on. We're going to have a great day. 404 00:26:07,510 --> 00:26:10,510 Does everyone have money? Yeah, we have plenty. We'll be fine. Okay, good. Look, 405 00:26:10,530 --> 00:26:13,270 have a good time. I'll pick you up at 6 o 'clock as soon as I finish at the 406 00:26:13,270 --> 00:26:16,060 hairdresser's. Here, right? Right here. Okay, now do not... forget the buddy 407 00:26:16,060 --> 00:26:19,240 system, alright? Everyone, please, please stick together, okay? Yeah, sure, 408 00:26:19,240 --> 00:26:20,240 sure, don't get lost. 409 00:28:02,250 --> 00:28:03,430 He said we could ride someone. 410 00:28:03,850 --> 00:28:06,070 Well, that was before the labor dispute, son. 411 00:28:07,070 --> 00:28:08,330 What's a labor dispute? 412 00:28:09,270 --> 00:28:13,950 Oh, well, you see, that's when people refuse to do what they're supposed to do 413 00:28:13,950 --> 00:28:15,290 until they get paid more money. 414 00:28:16,050 --> 00:28:18,550 Gee, when I tried that, I got grounded. 415 00:28:19,430 --> 00:28:23,290 Oh. Well, listen, don't worry. We'll see more of San Francisco on the bus 416 00:28:23,290 --> 00:28:27,930 anyway. The important thing to remember is always know, don't panic, know where 417 00:28:27,930 --> 00:28:31,030 you are, and know exactly where you're going at all times. I know where I am. 418 00:28:32,460 --> 00:28:33,680 Hotel, okay? 419 00:28:38,140 --> 00:28:38,780 You 420 00:28:38,780 --> 00:28:50,200 look 421 00:28:50,200 --> 00:28:51,780 absolutely wonderful. 422 00:28:52,100 --> 00:28:54,460 Don't you mean I'm absolutely older? 423 00:28:54,680 --> 00:28:58,660 As I have always said, fine wine and fine women ripen with age. 424 00:28:59,210 --> 00:29:04,810 Oh, no, no. I remember that you always used to say, um, a beer, a blonde, and a 425 00:29:04,810 --> 00:29:06,950 B average, and you'd die a happy man. 426 00:29:07,190 --> 00:29:08,730 My past comes back to haunt me. 427 00:29:10,910 --> 00:29:11,889 How's Evelyn? 428 00:29:11,890 --> 00:29:14,170 Did she ever open that art gallery she wanted to? 429 00:29:14,730 --> 00:29:17,870 Yes. Uh, for a while. She didn't stay with it very long. 430 00:29:18,750 --> 00:29:22,590 She never stayed with anything very long. Uh, we haven't seen each other for 431 00:29:22,590 --> 00:29:23,249 some time. 432 00:29:23,250 --> 00:29:24,810 Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't know that. 433 00:29:25,350 --> 00:29:26,450 Nothing to be sorry about. 434 00:29:26,970 --> 00:29:28,330 Divorces happen in the best of families. 435 00:29:29,040 --> 00:29:30,840 To some of us, they even happen more than once. 436 00:29:31,180 --> 00:29:32,780 You've just got to keep trying until you get it right. 437 00:29:33,100 --> 00:29:35,220 What about you and Frank? Did you ever get together? 438 00:29:36,400 --> 00:29:37,400 Yeah. 439 00:29:37,760 --> 00:29:42,280 In fact, one year together turned into nine more as a widow. 440 00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:45,000 Oh. 441 00:29:45,320 --> 00:29:46,480 Nine years is a long time. 442 00:29:47,800 --> 00:29:48,800 Yeah. 443 00:29:49,900 --> 00:29:53,820 Well, since we're both presently unattached, how about a little dinner 444 00:29:53,980 --> 00:29:55,160 We've got a lot of catching up to do. 445 00:29:55,420 --> 00:29:58,340 Oh, Ted, I'd really love to, but see, the thing is... 446 00:29:58,830 --> 00:30:00,510 I'm reattached. 447 00:30:01,210 --> 00:30:04,330 Recently, as a matter of fact. His name is Tom Bradford. 448 00:30:04,530 --> 00:30:07,070 Oh. Well, congratulations. 449 00:30:07,570 --> 00:30:11,010 Thank you. In fact, I'm here about my new family. 450 00:30:14,670 --> 00:30:15,670 Mary Bradford? 451 00:30:15,890 --> 00:30:20,750 Yes, she's the eldest daughter. In fact, she has seven brothers and sisters. 452 00:30:22,170 --> 00:30:24,790 You married into a family with eight children? 453 00:30:25,090 --> 00:30:26,090 Yeah. 454 00:30:27,150 --> 00:30:29,410 Well, you always did do everything in a big way, didn't you? 455 00:30:41,650 --> 00:30:42,090 Are 456 00:30:42,090 --> 00:30:48,990 we 457 00:30:48,990 --> 00:30:50,790 here? What? Like, almost. 458 00:30:51,790 --> 00:30:54,990 Where are we? Come on, don't ask so many questions. 459 00:30:55,760 --> 00:31:02,140 Now, let's see. If we take bus 6 and get a transfer to bus 15 and then take bus 460 00:31:02,140 --> 00:31:03,140 7 uptown. 461 00:31:03,680 --> 00:31:05,940 Why don't we just quit and take a taxi? 462 00:31:06,620 --> 00:31:09,720 No, no. Your father doesn't know the meaning of the word quit. 463 00:31:10,420 --> 00:31:13,500 Or are we supposed to take bus 10 uptown? 464 00:31:14,480 --> 00:31:16,380 I don't know. What? 465 00:31:18,480 --> 00:31:19,480 Come on, Dad. 466 00:31:19,860 --> 00:31:20,860 Here's our bus. 467 00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:22,920 No, no. Let's get our bearings first. 468 00:31:24,500 --> 00:31:25,500 Here's our bus. 469 00:31:26,440 --> 00:31:27,620 Really ask somebody. 470 00:31:31,180 --> 00:31:32,540 Nicholas, wait! 471 00:31:32,760 --> 00:31:33,760 Nicholas! 472 00:32:08,430 --> 00:32:10,110 We're so worried about you. I've looked everywhere. 473 00:32:10,330 --> 00:32:14,330 A hundred miles, bus routes, every bus, every bus stop. I cannot find him. 474 00:32:14,430 --> 00:32:17,350 Eighty -six million dollars a year the city spends, and they don't have a lost 475 00:32:17,350 --> 00:32:17,969 and found. 476 00:32:17,970 --> 00:32:20,750 I've lost Nicholas. Tom, please. Yes, the operator. Get me the police right 477 00:32:20,750 --> 00:32:23,070 away. Tom, take a deep breath. If you'll just let me explain. No, no, no, I 478 00:32:23,070 --> 00:32:26,710 can't. I can't. I can't listen. Hello? Tom. Yes, please. It wasn't my fault. 479 00:32:26,790 --> 00:32:29,810 Yes, I want to report a missing child. He's eight years old. He's about this 480 00:32:29,810 --> 00:32:33,690 high. No, he's this high. He has a red and blue striped shirt. Oh, no, here he 481 00:32:33,690 --> 00:32:34,930 is. I'm sorry. Cancel that. 482 00:32:35,330 --> 00:32:36,410 Dad, what are you doing? 483 00:32:38,480 --> 00:32:41,540 Tommy, Tommy, what happened? You should be so proud of how he found his way back 484 00:32:41,540 --> 00:32:44,440 here. Here, sit down. Your feet must be killing you. No, no, it's not my feet 485 00:32:44,440 --> 00:32:45,740 that's killing me. It's my children. 486 00:32:46,140 --> 00:32:49,820 Slowly, painfully, without mercy. 487 00:32:50,640 --> 00:32:52,840 Dad, when are we going to have dinner? 488 00:32:56,180 --> 00:32:58,160 Are you sure you don't want to go with me and the kids today? 489 00:32:58,460 --> 00:33:02,540 Oh, gosh, I'd ruin it for everybody, I tell you. After today's maneuvers, my 490 00:33:02,540 --> 00:33:05,040 mind and my body need a good night's rest. 491 00:33:05,760 --> 00:33:09,530 Okay, but, uh... Be ready for tomorrow, because you and I are going to have the 492 00:33:09,530 --> 00:33:10,530 time of our lives. 493 00:33:10,810 --> 00:33:11,810 I promise. 494 00:33:12,130 --> 00:33:13,130 That's the deal. 495 00:33:17,970 --> 00:33:20,230 The day is all ours. What would you like to do? 496 00:33:20,550 --> 00:33:21,850 Oh, everything. 497 00:33:22,210 --> 00:33:23,410 As you wish, my lady. 498 00:33:23,870 --> 00:33:25,530 Everything and more. 499 00:33:52,879 --> 00:33:56,660 Hey, we better get back to our respective hotels, huh? Oh, I guess 500 00:33:56,820 --> 00:33:59,700 I still have to give my acceptance speech a final polish. 501 00:33:59,940 --> 00:34:01,720 Hey, don't take it so seriously. 502 00:34:02,220 --> 00:34:04,360 Most people never listen to speeches anyway. 503 00:34:04,660 --> 00:34:06,960 Hey, you really know how to massage a guy's ego. 504 00:34:16,139 --> 00:34:17,139 Hey, Mary. 505 00:34:17,179 --> 00:34:18,239 I didn't know you were home. 506 00:34:19,040 --> 00:34:20,260 Yeah, I just got here, Abby. 507 00:34:21,929 --> 00:34:24,330 Listen, I don't have to go to this awards thing tonight, do I? 508 00:34:24,550 --> 00:34:27,190 Oh, no, no. I mean, I'm sure you've heard your dad speak a hundred times 509 00:34:27,190 --> 00:34:28,190 already, right? 510 00:34:28,270 --> 00:34:32,889 Right. Thanks. However, when you hear my good news, you might just change your 511 00:34:32,889 --> 00:34:36,010 mind. Well, there's an excellent chance that you might get to go to the medical 512 00:34:36,010 --> 00:34:37,489 school of your choice next fall. 513 00:34:37,730 --> 00:34:40,250 Abby, we've been through this, okay? I didn't make it. 514 00:34:40,510 --> 00:34:41,710 It's over and past. 515 00:34:41,949 --> 00:34:46,610 No, it's not over and past, you see, because I spoke to the dean of 516 00:34:46,610 --> 00:34:49,030 of the med school, and he said... You didn't do that. 517 00:34:49,370 --> 00:34:53,370 Yes, I did, because he's this old and dear friend of mine. And when I told him 518 00:34:53,370 --> 00:34:56,610 who you were, he said he was sure that he could... I don't believe what I'm 519 00:34:56,610 --> 00:35:00,350 hearing, Abby. Maybe I'm dreaming, Harl. A nightmare. I don't understand. And 520 00:35:00,350 --> 00:35:03,570 you, you were a part in this, weren't you? What? What is she talking about? I 521 00:35:03,570 --> 00:35:07,090 was just telling her my good news about Ted Kellogg, and she... Abby, what is so 522 00:35:07,090 --> 00:35:11,010 good about you interfering in my life? I can't believe you'd do this, especially 523 00:35:11,010 --> 00:35:12,070 without asking me. 524 00:35:13,339 --> 00:35:16,800 Oh, I see. Before I go out of my way to help you, I'm supposed to come to you 525 00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:20,560 and beg your permission. Is that it? Yes, and you don't have my permission, 526 00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:21,600 I don't need your help. 527 00:35:23,820 --> 00:35:27,340 I don't get it. Abby, I can't find my speech. Well, what did we do wrong? 528 00:35:27,580 --> 00:35:31,480 Abby, do you understand what I'm saying? My speech is gone. It's vanished. Never 529 00:35:31,480 --> 00:35:34,760 mind this girl talk. This is more important. I can't find the speech. 530 00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:48,860 Oh, please, Mary, feelings will keep. The important crisis is I have to make 531 00:35:48,860 --> 00:35:52,460 this speech in less than two hours. For days I've been working on this lousy 532 00:35:52,460 --> 00:35:54,140 thing. I don't even know the first line. 533 00:35:54,360 --> 00:35:58,440 It was bad enough standing up there alone in front of all those gray -haired 534 00:35:58,440 --> 00:36:02,360 with their blue -haired wives. But now, all I would have had to do was stammer 535 00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:06,340 through a neatly typed speech that was all written out for me. But now, 536 00:36:06,340 --> 00:36:08,680 extemporaneously... Extemporaneously. 537 00:36:09,080 --> 00:36:12,160 Extemporaneously. I can't even say extemporaneously. In front of all those 538 00:36:12,160 --> 00:36:14,680 people, I am going to be the laughingstock of... the press club. 539 00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:18,280 Tom, relax. Really, I'm sure it's around here someplace. 540 00:36:18,540 --> 00:36:21,160 I know. I bet one of the kids knows where it is or knows where you left it. 541 00:36:21,160 --> 00:36:24,080 That's right. The kids, you're right. Nancy, Elizabeth, come, come. Where are 542 00:36:24,080 --> 00:36:25,900 they? Where are they? No, they're not here. They're all gone. They're 543 00:36:25,900 --> 00:36:29,120 all over San Francisco. Oh, no. Whatever happened to the buddy system? 544 00:36:29,380 --> 00:36:32,760 Relax, relax. I have their itineraries. Look at this right here. 545 00:36:33,120 --> 00:36:34,120 Now, 546 00:36:34,400 --> 00:36:39,200 see, Susan said something about showing Nicholas the sites, but don't worry 547 00:36:39,200 --> 00:36:42,720 about them. She promised to be back early, and that just leaves, uh, Joanie. 548 00:36:43,120 --> 00:36:46,980 who was going to some matinee on Pacific Street. That's right. 549 00:36:47,560 --> 00:36:49,820 And Elizabeth was going to the war. 550 00:36:54,060 --> 00:36:55,740 Nancy planned a day of shopping. 551 00:36:56,860 --> 00:36:57,960 Did I forget anyone? 552 00:36:58,720 --> 00:37:04,080 Tommy. Tommy said, oh, he said something about visiting a museum on Broadway. 553 00:37:11,150 --> 00:37:14,470 Among a few non -repeatable tidbits, Mary indicates she knows nothing about 554 00:37:14,470 --> 00:37:15,308 Dad's speech. 555 00:37:15,310 --> 00:37:18,730 I can't even believe this whole bum trip. I could have died when Dad drove 556 00:37:18,730 --> 00:37:22,370 and started honking like a crazy man. At least he didn't yank you out of the 557 00:37:22,370 --> 00:37:26,250 theater in the middle of the third act. Who wants a stupid speech anyway? 558 00:37:26,610 --> 00:37:30,470 Well, I looked everywhere and I can't find it. Well, does anyone have any 559 00:37:30,470 --> 00:37:31,470 brilliant ideas? 560 00:37:31,630 --> 00:37:34,950 Yeah, why don't we tell Dad to quit blaming us for his carelessness? 561 00:37:35,290 --> 00:37:36,290 Yeah, here, here. 562 00:37:36,490 --> 00:37:38,070 Look, nobody's blaming anyone. 563 00:37:40,450 --> 00:37:42,370 All right. Who has my speech? 564 00:37:42,610 --> 00:37:44,450 No one is blaming everyone. 565 00:37:44,830 --> 00:37:47,690 Look, my speech is not at the hotel, so it's got to be here. 566 00:37:48,390 --> 00:37:52,350 Tom, look, we have looked everywhere, I promise you, and we can't find it. I'm 567 00:37:52,350 --> 00:37:55,750 sorry. Dad, what did we tell you? We don't have it. You see, Abby, none of 568 00:37:55,750 --> 00:37:57,130 would have happened if we came here alone. 569 00:37:57,510 --> 00:38:00,930 Oh, Dad, come on. We haven't done anything wrong. 570 00:38:01,930 --> 00:38:05,350 She's right. All we did was try to have a little bit of fun. Jeez, it's my first 571 00:38:05,350 --> 00:38:06,229 day here. 572 00:38:06,230 --> 00:38:08,650 You've been treating this all like private... It's in an army. Why do you 573 00:38:08,650 --> 00:38:11,490 act like a platoon leader? Yeah, Daddy, you haven't been very fair. 574 00:38:11,750 --> 00:38:15,570 You know, how am I supposed to act? How do you suppose I'm supposed to get nine 575 00:38:15,570 --> 00:38:20,530 people and 14 pieces of luggage, an automobile and a frog, from point A to 576 00:38:20,530 --> 00:38:22,370 B without somebody being a platoon leader? 577 00:38:22,810 --> 00:38:25,470 Personally, I think I did a very good job under the circumstances. 578 00:38:25,730 --> 00:38:26,910 Daddy, you're being impossible. 579 00:38:27,570 --> 00:38:31,290 What? That's a nice thing to say. What do you think, I'm incapable of having a 580 00:38:31,290 --> 00:38:32,290 good time? Huh? 581 00:38:32,710 --> 00:38:34,370 Do you think that I'm some kind of a rotten sport? 582 00:38:34,570 --> 00:38:37,870 That remark is as inconsiderate as Mary, who doesn't even have the common 583 00:38:37,870 --> 00:38:41,570 decency to say thank you to me. Hey, wait a minute, Dad. Wait a minute. I 584 00:38:41,570 --> 00:38:45,310 to Mary about that med school thing, and I don't blame her for being upset. I 585 00:38:45,310 --> 00:38:48,810 mean, you guys didn't have any right to go behind her back like that and then 586 00:38:48,810 --> 00:38:52,290 ask that dean for special treatment. You're absolutely correct, Joanie. 587 00:38:52,790 --> 00:38:55,230 Parents have no rights, only responsibilities. 588 00:38:55,790 --> 00:38:58,050 So what about our responsibilities to ourselves? 589 00:38:59,819 --> 00:39:03,400 Boy, oh boy, I can see by the look on all your faces that you're not very 590 00:39:03,400 --> 00:39:05,300 with the job I'm doing as the father, are you? 591 00:39:05,940 --> 00:39:07,660 All right, help yourselves, huh? 592 00:39:07,860 --> 00:39:09,000 Do it all by yourself. 593 00:39:09,320 --> 00:39:12,700 All right, then you're on your own, because as of right now, I'm a free 594 00:39:12,760 --> 00:39:13,658 That's right. 595 00:39:13,660 --> 00:39:16,460 Effective immediately, I resign as the father. I quit. 596 00:39:17,000 --> 00:39:20,340 Dad, come on. If you don't mean that, how are we going to get along? 597 00:39:21,210 --> 00:39:25,250 That's not my job, ma 'am. You understand? I'm not going to tell you. 598 00:39:25,250 --> 00:39:28,570 vote amongst yourselves democratically. I'm sure that'll keep you busy for a 599 00:39:28,570 --> 00:39:29,570 long while. 600 00:39:29,590 --> 00:39:30,750 Yeah, and who's going to pay? 601 00:39:31,070 --> 00:39:34,470 It's not my job to tell you. However, I can suggest that you ask Elizabeth. 602 00:39:34,710 --> 00:39:36,110 She brought her own money here. 603 00:39:36,470 --> 00:39:38,950 It's not my job, remember? I'm not involved. 604 00:39:39,370 --> 00:39:40,370 I quit. 605 00:39:43,030 --> 00:39:48,050 Your dad's quit. 606 00:39:57,930 --> 00:40:01,430 I suppose you're going to tell me that this whole dumb thing is my fault and I 607 00:40:01,430 --> 00:40:04,730 shouldn't have been so ungrateful. No, no, as a matter of fact, I was coming in 608 00:40:04,730 --> 00:40:07,350 here to tell you that I don't think you can take sole credit for your father's 609 00:40:07,350 --> 00:40:08,350 temporary insanity. 610 00:40:10,070 --> 00:40:14,370 Look, Abby, I want you to tell your old and dear friend to get off my case, 611 00:40:14,470 --> 00:40:15,408 okay? 612 00:40:15,410 --> 00:40:17,050 Okay. Anything you say. 613 00:40:18,630 --> 00:40:20,050 I just thought you wanted to go. 614 00:40:21,030 --> 00:40:22,890 More than anything I've ever wanted. 615 00:40:23,570 --> 00:40:24,790 But not that way. 616 00:40:26,000 --> 00:40:27,000 Don't you see that? 617 00:40:27,040 --> 00:40:31,440 That if I get in because you pulled strings, I'll never know if I could have 618 00:40:31,440 --> 00:40:32,440 done it on my own. 619 00:40:35,000 --> 00:40:37,540 Is that more important to you than going to a particular school? 620 00:40:38,800 --> 00:40:39,800 Very much. 621 00:40:41,440 --> 00:40:43,880 Mary, let me just explain to you why I did what I did, okay? 622 00:40:46,100 --> 00:40:50,460 When I saw how crushed you were, well, I knew Tom couldn't do anything, so I 623 00:40:50,460 --> 00:40:52,180 felt I had to do something, you know? 624 00:40:52,840 --> 00:40:59,530 Well... To help you both out at the same time, and I guess to prove 625 00:40:59,530 --> 00:41:00,530 myself, too. 626 00:41:02,870 --> 00:41:04,330 Abby, that was very nice. 627 00:41:05,170 --> 00:41:09,130 But you and Dad aren't always going to be around to patch things up. 628 00:41:09,670 --> 00:41:11,750 I've got to start doing that on my own. 629 00:41:12,410 --> 00:41:17,070 And if I can't make it doing this, well, then I'll just have to try something 630 00:41:17,070 --> 00:41:18,070 else. 631 00:41:19,710 --> 00:41:21,970 Look, I'm sorry I didn't talk to you first. 632 00:41:22,620 --> 00:41:29,140 And I guess I just have to learn how to, you know, stand back and let you handle 633 00:41:29,140 --> 00:41:30,140 things on your own. 634 00:41:30,900 --> 00:41:35,160 Yeah, well, don't stand back too far. I might need your help someday. 635 00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:40,500 When you do, just ask, okay? Like I'm asking right now. See, your father's 636 00:41:40,500 --> 00:41:42,900 to be back any minute, and I'm not dressed, and I've got to get out of 637 00:41:43,960 --> 00:41:47,280 Listen, you don't have to prove yourself to me, Abby. 638 00:41:48,840 --> 00:41:50,140 Okay? Let's go. Okay. 639 00:41:54,599 --> 00:41:59,080 Oh, there you are. I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I just had to get ready. I just had a 640 00:41:59,080 --> 00:42:02,240 talk with Mary. No, no, I don't want to talk about it. It's not my job anymore. 641 00:42:02,420 --> 00:42:03,880 Tom, please stop grinding this out. 642 00:42:04,140 --> 00:42:06,880 No, no, we'll talk about it later. Right now I need silence. I have to think 643 00:42:06,880 --> 00:42:08,200 about my acceptance speech. Okay. 644 00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:27,160 Don't worry, honey. Everything's going to be okay. Just loosen up, okay? 645 00:42:28,180 --> 00:42:34,880 And at a time like this, one is tempted to dwell on the names of former 646 00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:40,620 giants of journalism upon whom we have bestowed these awards in previous years. 647 00:42:45,880 --> 00:42:52,120 Now, since we have a number of awards, why don't we start with the award for... 648 00:42:53,359 --> 00:42:54,359 editorial cartoon. 649 00:42:55,160 --> 00:42:59,620 And from Los Angeles, Miss Wilma Blair. 650 00:43:03,440 --> 00:43:04,440 Don't worry. 651 00:43:05,260 --> 00:43:08,720 Sir, hi. We're here at the press club. Sorry, this is a private affair. 652 00:43:09,260 --> 00:43:10,400 Well, I know, but we're invited. 653 00:43:10,780 --> 00:43:11,980 I'll have to see your invitations. 654 00:43:12,240 --> 00:43:16,340 Well, our father has invitations, and he's right inside. No one gets in 655 00:43:16,340 --> 00:43:17,340 an invitation. 656 00:43:18,060 --> 00:43:19,400 Well, it was a nice try. 657 00:43:19,840 --> 00:43:23,220 I think we ought to just go home, put on our grubbies, and goof off. No, come 658 00:43:23,220 --> 00:43:26,860 on, you guys. You know, this is Dad's big chance in the limelight. We've got 659 00:43:26,860 --> 00:43:27,459 be there. 660 00:43:27,460 --> 00:43:29,700 Really, I think the least that we can do is share it with him. 661 00:43:29,900 --> 00:43:31,640 Even if he doesn't deserve it? Yes. 662 00:43:31,880 --> 00:43:35,380 Well, we could storm the gates. No, that only works at rock concerts. 663 00:43:35,640 --> 00:43:37,440 Yeah, but there's something else that works at rock concerts. 664 00:43:37,660 --> 00:43:44,560 What? Follow me. I've got an idea. Come on. And now, 665 00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:46,220 our major award. 666 00:43:47,050 --> 00:43:53,790 For outstanding journalistic excellence and for superior public service, this 667 00:43:53,790 --> 00:44:00,050 year's special altruistic award goes to the Sacramento Register columnist, Mr. 668 00:44:00,410 --> 00:44:01,850 Thomas Bradford. 669 00:44:02,610 --> 00:44:03,610 Excuse 670 00:44:03,610 --> 00:44:10,250 me, sir. 671 00:44:10,310 --> 00:44:14,530 Hi. I was walking outside your building, and I found this money sitting on the 672 00:44:14,530 --> 00:44:18,110 steps, and I thought maybe you'd know who it belonged to or something. I asked 673 00:44:18,110 --> 00:44:20,810 all kinds of people walking out there, but they just didn't seem to know who it 674 00:44:20,810 --> 00:44:24,050 was, and it was directly to you. Do you think you could deliver it to the proper 675 00:44:24,050 --> 00:44:25,050 party? 676 00:44:36,050 --> 00:44:37,970 Thank you very much. 677 00:44:42,380 --> 00:44:47,400 Let me begin by saying that... 678 00:44:47,400 --> 00:44:50,020 Sorry, excuse me. 679 00:44:50,640 --> 00:44:56,160 I want to thank you very much for this wonderful award. 680 00:44:56,420 --> 00:45:03,360 Since you members of the press club have chosen me to be your altruistic 681 00:45:03,360 --> 00:45:09,660 person, I feel that it is my... 682 00:45:12,010 --> 00:45:18,230 My responsibility to warn you that altruism isn't 683 00:45:18,230 --> 00:45:21,150 all that it's cracked up to be. 684 00:45:21,390 --> 00:45:27,370 The dictionary says that altruism is an unselfish concern 685 00:45:27,370 --> 00:45:30,990 for others. That's very incomplete. 686 00:45:31,270 --> 00:45:38,170 What the dictionary neglects to mention is that extending 687 00:45:38,170 --> 00:45:39,430 a helping hand... 688 00:45:40,180 --> 00:45:47,020 guarantees you only one thing bruised fingers from the from 689 00:45:47,020 --> 00:45:53,880 the thankless foot of humanity and I come to you man with bruised fingers 690 00:45:53,880 --> 00:45:57,580 I I know you're thinking that that's some kind of 691 00:45:57,580 --> 00:46:01,120 blasphemy 692 00:46:01,120 --> 00:46:07,600 but I promise you that I'm only speaking from 693 00:46:08,650 --> 00:46:09,730 Harsh experience. 694 00:46:12,590 --> 00:46:17,290 Doing things for others has definite drawbacks. 695 00:46:18,350 --> 00:46:25,110 Help, especially the unsolicited kind, it usually is 696 00:46:25,110 --> 00:46:28,630 ignored or abused or turned on you. 697 00:46:28,930 --> 00:46:35,630 You're called a barinsky or a busybody or even 698 00:46:35,630 --> 00:46:36,630 worse, 699 00:46:37,580 --> 00:46:38,580 A platoon leader. 700 00:46:40,600 --> 00:46:47,160 It's not exactly the kind of reward that an altruistic person might expect, but 701 00:46:47,160 --> 00:46:48,740 it's the one that you're likely to get. 702 00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:53,500 Except sometimes, I guess you do get a reward. 703 00:46:55,200 --> 00:47:01,180 It's not something tangible, like public recognition or plaques or something you 704 00:47:01,180 --> 00:47:02,180 can take to the bank. 705 00:47:03,300 --> 00:47:06,680 It's more like, well, like the... 706 00:47:07,790 --> 00:47:12,930 reward of seeing someone that you've helped begin to help themselves 707 00:47:12,930 --> 00:47:18,430 or watching them become a better person or an independent person. 708 00:47:18,990 --> 00:47:22,610 Yes, I think it's the independence that makes the difference. 709 00:47:22,950 --> 00:47:29,310 When a person tells you that your help is no longer needed or wanted, 710 00:47:29,390 --> 00:47:32,590 you shouldn't tune out. 711 00:47:33,410 --> 00:47:37,360 When they say that they can make it on their own, You shouldn't stand in the 712 00:47:37,360 --> 00:47:38,319 way. 713 00:47:38,320 --> 00:47:44,800 It's not always easy, but you have to sort of stand back and hope that 714 00:47:44,800 --> 00:47:51,280 they'll be all right, that maybe they'll even go out and help somebody else. 715 00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:54,180 And I guess that's the real reward. 716 00:47:55,040 --> 00:47:57,280 I guess that's what altruism is all about. 717 00:47:58,460 --> 00:48:03,460 And take it from a man with bruised fingers. 718 00:48:06,480 --> 00:48:07,480 You can never quit. 719 00:48:24,880 --> 00:48:28,780 Wait, how did you kids get in? Oh, Elizabeth bribed the man at the door. 720 00:48:28,900 --> 00:48:30,000 Elizabeth, you shouldn't have. 721 00:48:30,320 --> 00:48:31,760 Why not? Dad said he had my own money. 722 00:48:32,160 --> 00:48:36,660 Well, Dad, what are we going to do now? You're the platoon leader. I don't know 723 00:48:36,660 --> 00:48:38,420 exactly. Anything you want, I guess. 724 00:48:38,660 --> 00:48:40,540 I want a soda and some bugs for my frog. 725 00:48:41,060 --> 00:48:43,160 Okay. All right. You got it, son. 726 00:48:43,940 --> 00:48:48,340 Uh -oh. Let me get some money. I think I just... Oh, no. I don't believe this. 727 00:48:48,380 --> 00:48:49,380 You don't know what I did. 728 00:48:49,800 --> 00:48:50,800 My speech. 729 00:48:54,040 --> 00:48:58,800 I wouldn't forget it until I went and forgot it. Oh, well, it wasn't much good 730 00:48:58,800 --> 00:49:00,020 anyway. I think it was overwritten. 731 00:49:00,320 --> 00:49:02,020 All right, platoon, let's go. 732 00:49:02,700 --> 00:49:06,080 Do we still have to order the same thing? 733 00:49:06,360 --> 00:49:09,180 No, everyone gets what he or she wants tonight. 734 00:49:09,680 --> 00:49:10,780 Okay, let's go. 735 00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:12,980 Oh, hold it, everybody. 736 00:49:13,740 --> 00:49:16,040 Now I've got to make a pit stop.